I just got back from a meeting dealing with company retirement plans, 401k’s and such, and I swear to god it feels like I’ve had all of the blood sucked out of my system at once.

     Why does this stuff have to be so dull?

I know it’s important.. I know it’s my responsibility as breadwinner to take care of this stuff. I know it’s part of being a grown up…

     I know that five minutes into the thing, I was asleep.

The woman at the podium was pointed at a pie chart and said to the crowd, "A new car worth $20,000 now will cost $70,000 twenty years from now.. ARE YOU GOING TO BE READY?!"

And I’m sitting in the back thinking to myself, "Fuck off, does anyone know where I can get a good omlette?"

55 minutes later, someone was nudging me to wake up.

     and wouldn’t you know it.. still no eggs.