Hey Teacher, Leave Those Kids Alone

I found this anonymous note on my desk the other day:

    Things to Buy For Mr. Luft

        Tic Tacs
        Extra Strength deodorant
        Minty Toothpaste
        Antibacterial Soap
        Clean Clothes
        Washer and Dryer
        Laundry Detergent
        Rogaine
        A New Pair of Brand Name Shoes
        Diet Pills
        Anger Management Classes

...Did I mention that midterm grades just came out?