It's not that I didn't feel welcome,Just like anything else, it's going to take some time to get it back, I guess.
It's that I didn't feel at home.
The balance, the comfort, the ease...That feeling like what I'm doing is something I'm doing for myself and not so much a retaliation or an equal and opposite reaction. I mean, in the end it's what I need; it always has been -- but for whatever reason the process always starts out like trying to give a cat a bath or making them swallow a pill.
Why do I always fight the medicine?
Still, it was good to see old friends and catch up on old feelings. Conversations overruling menus, waitress waiting to ...wait on us, and then repaying the favor by not telling us we had stayed past closing when we finally needed a check.
But although 'one more' was gladly welcomed at first, there reached a point where it was pretty clear that three had definitley become a crowd. Who knows, maybe I should have just gone home right then and there, but it just seemed to be too early to make that kind of call.
Eventually I just started driving without worrying where I was going.
An hour later when the wine started to wear off -- the words "fuck it" started to creep into my consciousness, and I found myself sitting at a small table near the DJ booth nursing a five-dollar cup of coffee that was poured for me by a girl with pierced nipples and a tattoo of an elephant over her ass.
It wasn't really what I needed, but it's wasn't like it was gonna kill me either. Besides, the music was loud and it was somewhere to be. And even though it was the last thing you might have ever expected from the place, I gotta tell ya
It was a really good cup of coffee.
[Listening to: T.I., "Let's Get Away"]
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