As I start to stare down the prospect of my upcoming job hunt, it occurs to me that this might not be the absolute worst time in the world to be looking for a new opportunity.
For example, reports have it that Paul Tagliabue is set to retire his post as the longtime comissioner for the NFL. And while I'm sure he works hard keeping the league successful -- I'm having a hard time coming up with a solid list of exactly what he does day to day in order to earn his $9 million salary.
I mean when you get right down to it -- each individual NFL franchise runs itself as an independent corporation that exists under the leagues umbrella.
The way I look at it, things have timed themselves out just right for the NFL. If this change of power had come about any sooner, I might not have been available to take the position.
For example, reports have it that Paul Tagliabue is set to retire his post as the longtime comissioner for the NFL. And while I'm sure he works hard keeping the league successful -- I'm having a hard time coming up with a solid list of exactly what he does day to day in order to earn his $9 million salary.
I mean when you get right down to it -- each individual NFL franchise runs itself as an independent corporation that exists under the leagues umbrella.
It's not like Tagliabue calls plays or officiates games or anything. As far as I can see his only responsibilities are to talk to the media and hand the trophy to the team that wins the Super Bowl...Kinda like McDonalds when you think about it.
As a matter of fact, it seems like if that's all he really in charge of then there's a heck of a lot of room left for expansion when it comes to the things I could do to help out the league.Hell -- I could do that
For example, if elected commissioner I would gladly..But why stop there? -- The NFL is a media juggernaut, armed with hundreds of millionare employees and exemption from the government's anti-trust laws. Why not pool our resources to buy some fighter planes and tanks? You know -- generate a little pre-season excitement by invading non-NFL cities and declaring them conquered in the name of whatever team should be the first to secure the unconditional surrender of the local municipal governments?* Audition prosepective cheerleaders
* Suspend any player who puts out their own rap album
* Order all Cowboys fans under the age of 10 to kick Terrell Owens in the nuts
* Demand that all touchdowns be followed by celebration dances
* Legalize steroids "just to see what happens"
* Lock John Madden in a small room and force him to listen to his own inane rantings
* Banish Jake Plummer to the Phantom Zone.
The way I look at it, things have timed themselves out just right for the NFL. If this change of power had come about any sooner, I might not have been available to take the position.
References Available Upon Request.
[Listening to: Amberlin, "Paper Thin Hymn"]
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