The Friday Hot Sheet

Summer is racing by. The other day at the grocery store I noticed they've already got out the little separate section for school supplies. There's an email in my inbox reminding me about little league registration for the upcoming Fall season. It seems like just yesterday that I was looking forward to the end of the school year so I could spend more time with the boy.

Of course it's not really like I've lost the time completely -- but it's one of those weird times where it seems like now that it's in the past, the memory of it seems very short. Relativity at play. Almost as if my realization of all the things I'll have to do between here and the end of August to ensure that things go smoothly is somehow so much heavier than the specific memories of June and July thus far, and so all the sudden it's as the one thing is just that much more immense than the other.
Kinda weird, when you think about it.
Of course a big part of that is probably related to the way this week has been utterly lackluster at work. I've been feeling really uninspired at the office lately, which is sort of a normal summer thing I suppose -- but there's not really tons of new or particularly exciting things happening there, which sorta screws the balance of time during the individual days up. You know how it is -- when you're at work it seems like every hour of doing nothing lasts forever, but once you get home and someone asks how your day was, you've got next to nothing to report, which makes the day suddenly feel really short and inconsequential in retrospect.
All of which is to say that I'm totally psyched to see Inception this weekend.
Honestly, I really think that's what it is. All my anticipation to see Chris Nolan's latest dream within a dream within an action movie within a dream movie has got me seeing this "not a lot happened" week in terms of some wacky time versus time construct that barely even makes sense to me.
So before I start jumping around staircase looking for a fight -- here are this week’s risers and fallers, and the buzz as it looks from here:
Mel Gibson  Holy crap. Have any of us had even half as bad a week as this guy has? Anybody notice how good Tiger is playing at the British Open (Don't even try to tell me those things aren't connected)? Day after day more tapes of the Road Warrior going batshit crazy -- recorded in perfect crystal clear "you just messed with the wrong woman" audio by his Russian girlfriend who is either looking to make him to confess to hitting her or find some way to prove that she isn't just making up her claims that he's a hateful, angry, unbalanced maniac who's got her scared for her and her child's life. Either way -- it's hard not to be somehow morbidly fascinated by it all (and the cute kitten recaps of the wackadoo quotes that keep coming out), even if it's just for the fact that there's just so much insane venom being revealed day after day. Seriously, who knew the guy was this far gone?


Inception I know I gushed about this in the opening paragraphs, but this is honestly the only movie I've been looking forward to in what has been a pretty lame summer season. Christopher Nolan's follow up to The Dark Knight features what appears to be a uniquely complex plot about people infiltrating and affecting the dreams of others matched with the kind of special effects that people want to see. And I don't say that lightly -- we've had movies come out this summer where characters could bend fire, movies where a child is able to do one-legged flip kick seemingly eight feet into the air, and a film where a bunch of dudes attempt to fly a tank. Essentially we're living in a computer-aided film age where just about anything you want to see is possible, and yet to have a trailer get you excited about an entire city folding over on itself is (at least for me) is pretty cool.

The odd thing is that here's a film that clearly announces itself as smart, or at the very least multi-layered -- which is a huge part of why I want to see it, and yet clearly it's got an action movie hiding inside of it (which considering Nolan's other work I'm pretty excited about too). In fact, my only real worry about this film is that much like The Matrix it will spur the growth of a super-annoying Twilight/Avatar style fanbase who try to make it out to be much more than it is.

To be perfectly honest, It's almost as if my real worry is that all the dummies who keep Adam Sandler rich will love this to the point where saying you like it too will rope you into conversations you'd normally avoid. Like I'd really prefer it if this was more my movie when I know (much like the Dark Knight) it will become a popular favorite. I'm not really 100% why that thought bothers me so much, but I suspect it comes from a feeling where I'd rather not be one of the masses when it comes to something like this -- and yet if it does take off and become the huge hit everyone expects it to be, how could you avoid it?


Maid Droid  Maid Droid is the story of a future where android technology has progressed to the point where people can purchase pretty girl shaped maid robots to clean around the house and look after their children while they're at work. One family does this, but die soon afterward in an accident, leaving the child in the care of the robot hottie. He eventually (of course) falls in love with it, and a large part of the remaining story deals with their struggles to make those feelings real.

Of course many people buy the maid droids simply to have sex with them -- which requires an upgrade (suggesting the Droids are made by ..Apple?) But for whatever reason this doesn't work for the protagonists -- but the man believes that he loves the robot, so they stay together regardless.

Then while all of this is happening the remains of the original android experiment -- robot pets (which were all recalled and thrown away) somehow congeal together to form one giant robot dog, which stalks the streets of Tokyo late at night and basically rapes unsuspecting women.

Then a puppet (who is 10 times creepier than the rape dog) tries to convince us that the women like it, because that's what women really want anyways.

Add in a third story about a police detective trying to stop the rape machine (as it's known) and what you have is this odd kind of retelling of the Pinocchio story from three different angles -- except this time there's animal rape and a sixty-year old man trying to get freaky with a 20 year-old girl who's pretending to be a robot.

If this all sounds kinda creepy and pervy -- well, that's because it is. There's a lot of despicable stuff in this flick. And yet, somehow there's this sweetness to the story. I mean, you sort of have to get past the robot rape dog part to see it, but it's there. I mean, lets not lie -- this is borderline porn (depending on your sensibilities), but it's sorta weird how a day or so after seeing this I'm sorta touched by just how much heart this dirty old man fantasy movie ended up having.

I don't know -- the more Asian cinema I take in (which is admittedly not tons) the more I'm surprised by what I get out of it. It makes me think I might not have even sat through this whole film a few years back.

Still, it's an interesting and bizarre movie -- almost in an Ichi the Killer/Oldboy sort of vein -- just with more weird sex than blood and gore. Not sure I'd recommend it to everyone, but I'm kinda glad I watched it, even if it was just for the experience.


Despicable MeI had problems with my internet last week, so I wasn't able to do a Hot Sheet -- but I did want to mention this. Despicable Me is a funny movie. My son is still doing the Steve Carell villain voice -- so if you've got kids and haven't seen it yet definitely check it out.

But be warned, despite some sweet moments and memorable scenes -- I found myself kinda bored during a lot of it. If you're on the fence about this as a date flick or something to catch because you like cartoons I might suggest waiting for a rental. It leans on the cute button waaaay too much, which is part of it's charm -- but it does so in a way that feels artificial, like "Here comes the little girl character to do her cute thing again -- prepare for FLUFFY!!"

Don't get me wrong, it's a fun ride for what it is -- but it's maybe not as astounding as people are making it out to be. I mean let's face it, this has been a pretty lame summer movie-wise. So in that respect, yeah -- Despicable Me was a billion times better than the last Shrek movie. But consider what that really means, you know?


Making MoneyMy boys in Vendetta Nation have been working hard lately, gearing up for a regional tour, promoting their upcoming album, and getting the video for their first single finished. It's always weird seeing your friends in things like this (not to mention the fact that a good half of this was shot at Endo) -- but I really dig this song, so I thought I'd pass it on to you.
See what you think!

[Listening to:  Ida Maria - "I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked" ]

Comments

Heff said…
Hope you enjoy "Inception".

After you see it, it will afterwards seem like a fleeting SECOND as well.

We're getting OLD, dude, and when that happens, retrospect seems like NO TIME AT ALL.

On the other topic, Heff has been through a bad breakup or two in his day, but "Gibson Gate" is just fucking HILARIOUS to me.

WHO ACTS LIKE THAT ? I mean REALLY ?!?
Zuly said…
Wait....you have a JOB? Haha. I don't know why but I just can't picture you in an office.

I'm also excited for Inception...but I'm even MORE excited for Salt next weekend *runs around doing the peepee dance* for obvious reasons.

Also, that's my favorite scene in Despicable Me. That little girl is the cutest.
Bef said…
something ain't clean in the milk with this "Gibson Gate"

I keep seeing folks talk about Inception...I don't know anything about it...
Folk said…
Folk think Folk liking that maid. She pretty.

Saw Despicable Me last night. It was cute. Not a knockout, but definitely cute. Didn't feel robbed like Folk normally does when Folk leaves the movies (well, there was that $6.00 drink)
JerseySjov said…
making money is a little mumble-y for my hip-hop taste, but liked the claps over the chorus and the gratuitous effects in the video.

i LOOOVEEE the song you're "listening to"
kit von b. said…
so despicable me...no bueno?
Hex said…
Heff -- It was fantastic, but I know exactly what you mean. I don't even have a yard, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna let any kids play on it.

Zuly -- Basically I'm the CEO of being cool. And business is good.

Bef -- The whole Gibson thing is weird. It's too entertaining to look away from, but I've got all sorts of questions about it too.

Folk -- Exactly. It was ok, my kid really liked it, but I've seen better kid movies.

Jersey -- I know this sounds cliche, but Makin Money is a lot better when you hear it live. Still a fun tune though.

Kit -- It's cute and fun, but it's not really all that clever in the way it goes about it. There are characters that only do cute things, and others who only do fun things. It's not bad, just sorta cookie cutter -- you know?