Wednesday, February 27

Wrong for so many reasons

Inexplicably famous chipmunk Nelly Furtado (shown here being kissed by a fat guy) will apparently perform a stripped-down interpretation of the hit single "I'm Like A Bird" with guitar virtuoso Steve Vai on the 44th Annual GRAMMY Awards telecast set for Wednesday, Feb. 27...

    why, god.. why?

Buoyant Cacophony

It’s one of those mornings where everyone is on the phone. Single-sided narratives fill the air all around me, penetrating cubicle walls as if they aren’t there at all... You can’t help but overhear what’s said, but it’s surprisingly easy to not listen.

Feels like floating in rough water. Up and down. Currents rolling all around me.

Work has been busy lately. Feeling the crunch. Recent lack of excellence has prompted me to keep my eyes on my paper, instead of rolled into the back of my skull during official meetings.

     Time flies when you’re doing what you’re told.

Home time has also run by, although at different speeds with different propulsions. Mostly blank television fueled come-downs from the rigors or corporate work/waiting tables/baby chasing.

There’s been time for writing, but energy has not followed; the words haven’t found their way through yet.

I’m between novels, having finished Junichiro Tanizaki’s The Key.. still looking for something interesting to follow it with. A week or so ago I began thumbing through a novel called Waiting by Chinese author Ha Jin, but it never really took off for me, and it’s been sitting on my desk ever since.

Just.. kinda floating.

     more later.

Sunday, February 24

Lemeiux's whiff

Gretz wouldn't have missed that shot.. no way., I wish somebody was here to watch this with me.

Saturday, February 23

Saving Private SNAFU

I feel as if I just lost a dear friend.

It's strange to think about the loss of someone you really only knew through their creativity. I never sat down with Chuck Jones, shared a drink, or talked about the world.

He made me laugh. Me inspired me, his work is a friend. That, thankfully, can never change.

But I suppose there are only so many bubbles that can pass through our lives...

Just because you do not know someone closely, it doesn't mean that you don't feel the loss. It doesn't mean that there isn't a feeling that something that touched you in even the smallest of ways is somehow different, like a flower cut at the stalk to put in a vase.

In todays world of comic-cons and fanboy infestation, you wonder if a compliment given has the same weight that it might when sent in a letter you never even knew if the person received or not. Not that compliments given at a pre-set autograph table are given with any less conviction, but that the setting finds a way to make them seem less individually special...

I wonder that because sometimes the internet seems like the biggest pre-fab fanboy convention ever assembled...

But I feel like I need to say it. I need to honor you in my own way. Perhaps as much for personal benefit as for a show of respect.

Chuck.. in September of 1942, 30 years before I was born, you made a film called "The Dover Boys." Every time I see it, the thing makes me laugh so hard there are tears in my eyes by the time it's over.

     ...And don't even get me started on Rikki-Tikki-Tavi.

Friday, February 22

Tuscan Panzanella

We had a department wide lunch yesterday, sort of a 'everyone bring in a dish and we’ll let our hair down for a while’ type of thing. When the meal is over there is a departmental meeting. Every time we have one of these lunches there is a theme installed that helps to make the event more interesting. The theme for yesterday’s lunch was "the good old days" - employees with long tenures telling us what the department was like in the past.

     5 years ago
     7 years ago
     10 years ago
     27 years ago...

                    Dear god.. 27 years at the same job?!?

Maybe it's because I'm not working something I like, but 27 years of anything has got to get old, doesn't it? I mean, maybe it's just me.. as funny as some of the stories were, the idea of working in one place for that length of time is simply horrific.

There are people who'd worked here for 5 years, left to pursue something else, and then came back for 9 more years... I mean, I can't even begin to get my head around that.

Maybe that's part of the problem - I don't know. The longest I've ever had one job is 3 years, and I quit that because I just …ran out of gas on it.

There's a guy who works here who is that sort of "too boisterous, too talkative, too creepy" type - a nice guy who I'm sure has a lot of interesting stories to tell; but he likes to rain them down on you in rapid fire mode, which makes him a chore to be around.

At the lunch while waiting in the food line, he complimented me on the story that I had published in Folio and mentioned some writing contests he thought I might be interested in. Turns out that he used to do some writing of his own back in the day..

     "Oh really." I say, "What sort of stuff?"
         ".. Porn."

Just think, 27 years of talking to that guy...

Thursday, February 21

Judge Ruxpin

Perhaps I've watched too much anime for my own good, but I don't know that I could sleep a wink knowing that some cyborg is keeping tabs on me -- no matter HOW cute he is...

I think the thing that I find the most creepy about this is (as the article puts it):

"The bears monitor patients' response times to spoken questions. They record how long they spend performing various tasks, before relaying conclusions to staff..."

Make sure you’ve got this straight – the teddy bears watch over the old people in the retirement village, give them verbal quizzes to test their mental reaction time, and then pass judgement on them?

I mean, just how much power does this teddy bear get?

     "What do you think Mr. Huggles?"
     "He’s not responding to treatment... pull the plug."

Friday, February 15

Challenging the very definition of the word cake

I came across an odd quote while hopping around the web the other day...

"Sartre took courses in philosophy and psychology, and was known as a voracious reader, a prankster, a composer of bawdy lyrics, and was something of a boxer. He was small and ugly, but exceptionally strong."

I don't know why I found it sort of interesting -- perhaps it's my upbringing in this age where a anyone who does anything that might be considered remotely remarkable ends up between the covers of People magazine or whatever..

Needless to say, My mental image of Jean-Paul was entirely different than this (I'm ashamed to admit I always imagined him looking like the guy from the film "Top Secret" who says the immortal line, "This is NOT Mel Torme!"). I'm still having trouble picturing him hitting someone..

My curosity peaked; I went hunting around for more on old Jean-Paul, which netted some interesting tidbits.

Wouldn't it have been more appropriate, though, if I had simply found nothing?

Wednesday, February 13

Actually Spoken During the Course of my Day

"I'm sorry, but I'm simply not going to choose Roy Scheider over nudity."

Tuesday, February 12

Joan Cusack's best line...

There was a point at work today wher I just had to get out of there... stretch my legs a bit, reset the batteries. I headed over to the restaraunt where my sister-in-law works for some quick grub and hang out time.

Calamari.. ok.
Blackened shrimp, not bad.. I've had better...

Then, right as I'm getting up to go -- Ebony drops this plate in front of me that's got this mongo slice of freshly made Key Lime Pie on it.

I'd share some with you so you could taste how incredible it was, but believe me.. that bitch was gone

Monday, February 11

Friday, February 8

How to tell if you're infamous at work:

You're at a loong boooring meeting, trying to pay attention. You're on record as the guy who falls asleep in meetings.

The guy next to you is asleep.. and you wish you were too, but you can't be.

Your boss -- three seats away.

     The meeting is boooring.

You can feel people watching you, waiting. It's almost like you're letting them down by staying awake. It's almost as if you're doing them a disservice by not getting fired.

On the way back from the meeting, people tell you they were watching you to see if you fell asleep.

Your so-called corporate life...

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